It was with great delight that 15 school friends met for lunch in London. Social media has made it possible to maintain contact, sometimes very occasionally, and to stay in touch with those who live abroad and with people who could not attend otherwise. The occasion was prompted by most of us reaching the grand age of seventy at some point this year. Previous get-togethers have shown that we are very comfortable in each others’ company. Despite various careers and different lives geographically we have a common experience. Attending boarding school and sharing our teenage years have brought us together. Some of the stories of our school day memories have been collected in my sub-site www.pannage.com/fssw73/ [will open in a new tab] That was then, this is now.
“I think age is terribly overrated. You’re okay as long as you don’t grow up. By all means grow old, but don’t mature. Remain childlike, retain wonder, the ability to be flabbergasted by something.”
Sir Billy Connolly
I think Billy Connolly hits a nail on the head and it was recognisable we shared a collective curiosity. Not just in each other, but what has happened to the world at large. Is this from our education? Who knows? There’s never enough to catch up fully with a lifetime of experiences. However, I will identify and link two stories, achievements if you like, of adult children from this group of friends.
- A book by Hannah Jane Walker, Sensitive: The Hidden Strength of Sensitivity & Empathy, Octopus Publishing, 2023 [link to Waterstones in a new tab] It is also subtitled “The power of feeling sensitive in a world that doesn’t” and, although it seems a modern cliche, tells the personal journey of enquiry – how this book comes about – and it is as fascinating as the research that ensues. If it isn’t you then you will know someone who is.
- An album by Gotts Street Park, On The Inside, 2023 [link to Spotify in a new tab] which is jazz-infused, cool playing and tight arrangements with different female singers. Play and chill.
“How terribly strange to be 70”
There is no denying Paul Simon’s lyrics “concern youth, disillusionment, relationships, old age, and mortality” and these spoke to our teenage condition in the late sixties. Uncertainty and trepidation in equal measure. Yet, also masked by confidence and a sense of opportunity. Indeed, from another song on this album, I went off to look for America. This story is told in the form of letters to and from home in ‘Atlantic Airmail’ (see here)
Old Friends from the album Bookends by Simon and Garfunkel [link to Spotify open in a new tab]
Old friends, old friends
Sat on their park bench like bookends
A newspaper blown through the grass
Falls on the round toes
Of the high shoes of the old friends
Old friends, winter companions, the old men
Lost in their overcoats, waiting for the sunset
The sounds of the city sifting through trees
Settle like dust on the shoulders of the old friends
Can you imagine us years from today
Sharing a park bench quietly?
How terribly strange to be 70
Old friends, memory brushes the same years
Silently sharing the same fears
The Value of Friendship
The meet-up confirmed the value of friendship. We have retained friendships and still meet with people we have worked with in different contexts. It was a positive measure of friendships when our group of golfers stayed together as our course was temporarily closed for extensive refurbishment and then we stayed together during the Covid months of isolation. (Don’t think too long about golf being allowed during the pandemic.) Our voluntary engagement with the local Singleton Environment Centre has also enabled the support of friendships in different ways. The following quote outlines the benefits of friendship and how it needs nurturing.
Promoting friendship requires both individual effort and societal support. Encouraging community involvement, providing resources for older adults to connect, and recognizing the value of social bonds are essential steps in enhancing the quality of life for older adults. As research continues to highlight the profound impact of friendships on health, it is clear that these relationships are a key factor in aging well and living a fulfilling life.
By understanding and appreciating the importance of friendship, we can take proactive steps to nurture these invaluable relationships, ensuring that the later years of life are not only healthy but also filled with joy and companionship.
Adlington